All I Have Page 5

  Nicholas' pulled the tool from her hands, turning her to face him again. "Ellie, please answer me. Where did you get the bruises?"

  This time she didn't shy away. "Listen, it's not a big deal."

  "Then why won't you tell me?"

  With her hands on her hips, she said haughtily, "Because as soon as I tell you I hurt myself while helping you out of that well, you'll start with the 'I told you so' routine. And how does that help matters? You'll only make me angry and–"

  Nicholas watched her lips move. Slowly and methodically, he noted her stance with one hip jutting to the side, and a finger waging back and forth in a sassy manner. Without thought of the consequences, he gently stepped forward. She finally stopped talking when they were an inch apart.

  "Ellie?"

  "Yes." She sounded breathless.

  "I'm going to kiss you now."

  "Oh…okay."

  His lips grazed hers for a brief second. When he pulled back, her eyes looked glossy. He'd only meant for their lips to touch, but now he wanted more. Bending forward again, he focused on the lushness of her mouth. A large crash sounded and they jumped apart. A metal bucket rolled toward them.

  Breathing heavily, Nicholas said, "I guess one of the horses kicked it?"

  Ellie nodded, but her eyes shifted around the barn and frown lines wrinkled her forehead.

  Nicholas knew the moment was over. Ellie backed away and placed a hand over her lips. He stared at her retreating form, suddenly realizing how alone he felt.

  Chapter Eight

  Several weeks passed. The bruises turned black, then purple, then yellow, then faded away, but poignant memories of a shared kiss lingered with Ellie. She tried to forget the kiss. Why? Nicholas was a wonderful guy. Why didn't she pursue him? The answer was simple. If she allowed her feelings to show, then Carla would come after him full force.

  Once, while in college, Ellie had brought a boy home to meet her father. Everything had been going great. They'd talked, the boy was grilled and survived, and Ellie had had high hopes of her father's approval. But, before the afternoon was over, he'd ended up in her stepmother's arms. One minute he was going to the kitchen to get her a glass of water, and the next, Ellie found the two of them locking lips. She'd hidden the incident from her father, but never forgotten it.

  Now, with Nicholas, she was afraid to showcase her feelings. She had to protect her father from emotional trauma; protect Nicholas from a scandal; and protect Shane from losing his job and thereby his home. All of which would happen if Carla learned of her interest in Nicholas.

  Each day, it became harder and harder to avoid him. He was everywhere. He followed her to the barn, the house, the fields. Whenever she saw him, he always had a hurt expression plastered on his face. She couldn't stand it anymore. She had to get away.

  Saddling her horse, she galloped to the eastern side of the property where a trail meandered to three waterfalls and a swimming hole.

  At the trail head, she dismounted and left the horse to graze. Backpack secure and water bottle in hand, she set out. When she reached the first waterfall, she stopped to rest. Because of a morning rain, the crystal clear water was running fast and splashing down into a large pool. The water rippled and she lost herself in memories.

  As a kid, she'd frolicked in the pool with her dad and mom, splashing and enjoying the summer sun. Now it was a quiet place. No laughter—just a place to reflect on happier times, times alive in her memories.

  Expelling a pent up breath, Ellie picked a flower and spun the stem in her fingers. Tears leaked down her cheeks. One of the petals was twisted and bent. Something once so perfect, now marred. Kind of like her life.

  "Ellie?

  The sound of Nicholas' voice had her swiping at her tears. Was she imagining his presence? She swiveled. "What are you doing here?"

  Nicholas angled his head and a sigh escaped his lips. She swallowed and tried to calm her racing pulse while wiping her sweaty palms on her jeans.

  "Jake told me you might be here. I need to talk to you."

  She shrugged and motioned him to another rock.

  Nicholas raked a hand through his hair and her pulse hammered. In a contrite voice, he said, "Look, I'm sorry if I was too forward. I mean, it was just a kiss. Almost not even a real one. Not really a big deal. But, well, I don't understand why you're avoiding me. My dad's on my case. He wants to know what I did because your dad's sensing a change in you and he's upset. And like I told him, if I knew, I'd tell him, but I don't."

  Ellie couldn't believe it. All this time she'd thought the kiss was serious, that it meant something to him. She had been protecting him by keeping her distance, when in truth; it hadn't meant anything to him! Just a kiss, not even a real kiss! Indeed! And to think he actually believed his admission would make things better! How insensitive and egotistical could he be?

  She knew she was gaping and closed her mouth. She'd come to this spot in search of peace and all she'd received was more heartache. Well, she had a plan of her own. She jumped up and stomped over to him. Placing her hands on the sides of his face, she kissed him passionately. Her arms snaked around his neck and she deepened the kiss. His arms wrapped around her middle, pulling her even closer. When their air ran out, she pulled back, licked her lips, stepped out of his embrace, and said, "You're so right. Nothing there."

  Not waiting for his reaction, she hurried to mount her horse and ride home. Her face burned with embarrassment at her action and her heart pumped wildly from the kiss and the lie. Maybe he'd felt nothing when their lips locked, but truthfully, she'd felt the earth move.

  As the wind streaked past her face, fresh tears streamed down her cheeks, and realization hit. Her feelings for Nicholas Wiseman were in full bloom and he couldn't care less.

  ****

  The entire house smelled of vinegar. While Ellie snapped green beans on the porch, Charlotte canned pickled beets. The last few days the men had been consumed with picking vegetables so the women could preserve and can them. The three men still walked the fields. As Ellie snapped another bean, fresh resentment at Carla and her laziness swept over her.

  Even now, Carla was in town having her hair and nails done for a party she'd planned for Friday night. A sadistic part of Ellie hoped the house still reeked of vinegar on Friday.

  In the distance, dust and grass flew in the air. Three racing horses approached neck in neck. They skidded to a halt in front of the porch and Ellie's father jumped from his mount first. Running up the steps, he grabbed one of the columns and yelled, "Safe!"

  Ellie watched as Nicholas and his father bumped into each other in an attempt to reach another column. Grunting, Shane shoved Nicholas into a spin.

  While Shane gloated over his victory, Ellie clutched the bowl of beans to her chest. Her attempt to rescue her work proved fruitless. Nicholas twisted and fell against her chair, knocking the bowl from her grasp. Beans flew through the air and landed in her hair, folds of her clothing, and on all over the porch. Nicholas rested his hands on the arms of her chair, his face only inches from hers, and grinned. Placing her palms on his chest, she pushed him away and jumped up, surveying her work littering the ground.

  Her father, his chest heaving rapidly from his exertion, said, "Ellie, we're sorry. We were–"

  "Racing," she answered; her posture rigid.

  Jake looked contrite. "Don't worry Lil Bit. We'll help you clean up those beans. Won't we boys?"

  She bent to pick up the mess and Nicholas did the same. Their heads bumped with a whack. Staggering backwards, Ellie grabbed the knot already forming beneath her fingertips.

  "What are you doing?" she hollered.

  "I'm trying to help you," he yelled back.

  "I don't need your help." She slammed inside the house. A second slam of the front door sounded and she turned to see her father's disapproving stare.

  "What's wrong with you? I've never see you so touchy."

  Focusing on a ladybug crawling on the wall, she said, "Nicholas j
ust rubs me the wrong way."

  "Oh, really. I think that reminds me of a story."

  "Oh, Dad, please not another story."

  Jake motioned for her to take a seat. "You need to hear this one."

  Ellie flopped into a chair, her gaze wandering everywhere but at him.

  "Let me see if I remember this right. There was this girl and she was always picking on me and trying to get my goat."

  "And what does that have to do with me?"

  "Well, it has everything to do with you—because I married the girl." His expression softened into a smile. "I don't think I ever told you how your mother followed me back here that summer we met. She had family in the area and it gave her an excuse to hang around me. She gave new meaning to personal torment. She said mean things about me and embarrassed me in public. All she wanted to do was fight with me."

  Ellie was in no mood to be cajoled. "Dad, can you come to the point?"

  "The point is, Ellie, you're a lot like your mother. You have feelings for Nicholas and that's why you keep fighting with him."

  She stared at him, aghast. Worry and fear gnawed at her insides. Had she been that transparent? If her dad could see it, then surely Carla must know.

  Instead of denying her father's claim, she did the only thing she could. "Dad, you're right. I do like Nicholas. What's not to like. He's attractive, a hard worker, cares for his father." While she talked his face spread into a wide grin. "But there's a problem. You see, he kissed me. And while I thought it was the start to a budding relationship, he made a point to tell me it didn't mean anything."

  Jake's face flamed red and he clinched and unclenched his fists.

  Instant worry shot through Ellie. When he walked toward the gun cabinet, she stopped him by placing a hand on his chest. "Dad! It wasn't a big deal. Just a simple kiss."

  "He kissed you and said it meant nothing! I disagree. Maybe it's time for him to do a little shotgun dance."

  Ellie knew Nicholas would be safer if her father made him leave, but she also knew he wanted to spend time with his father. She couldn't ruin that for him. Since she'd started this mess, she needed to fix it. "Dad, please don't make a scene. I'm fine. I just don't want to be around him, okay?"

  "Is that what you really want? Me to forget what you just told me?"

  "Yes, that's what I really want."

  "Okay," he shrugged, and walked outside. Ellie followed, pushing through the door at the same time her father's fist flew through the air and connected with Nicholas' face.

  Chapter Nine

  A raw steak rested on Nicholas' cheek. All day, Shane kept shaking his head and clucking. "What in the world did you do? I keep having a sense of déjà vu."

  Nicholas didn't feel like talking, so he just shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. That didn't keep his father from asking the same question every couple of hours. Finally, he tired of the questions. "Dad, I don't know–"

  "Don't give me that. Jake didn't hit you without a reason. I know better. This reminds me so much of when you were in high school and that dad came over and–"

  "Well…maybe it was because I kissed her."

  Shane glared at him and raised his arms in frustration. "Nick, I can't lose this job because you feel the need to kiss every girl in sight!"

  "Dad, I didn't–"

  "I don't want to hear it. I'll talk to Jake tomorrow and tell him you want to apologize—that you were wrong. That you were a jerk."

  Nicholas slammed the slab of meat on a nearby plate. His father was right about him being a jerk. How could he have been so stupid! Why had he thought that saying the kiss meant nothing would make everything right—make things go back to normal? It had been a stupid plan from the beginning. He'd missed Ellie's company and wanted her avoidance of him to stop. He'd figured that if he made up an excuse for the kiss, they could forget it ever happened, and maybe even start over.

  Sitting up and dropping his head into his hands, he decided he needed to make things right; even if it meant becoming Ellie's slave. Now he just had to wait for the right opportunity.

  ****

  Friday, the night of Carla's party, finally rolled around. It was to be an outside barbeque with lantern lights, a live band, and fireworks. Nicholas decided this would be the perfect time to prove his worth and make things up to Ellie. He worked like a dog all day in getting things ready for the party, taking special care to avoid Jake and his menacing stare, while, at the same time, fulfilling Carla's every crazy and inane request.

  Charlotte and Ellie spent the afternoon in the kitchen making the food. Slaw, potato salad, roast beef, and a slew of side dishes and desserts were brought out and placed on makeshift tables.

  As the afternoon waned and people started to arrive, more food was piled on the long tables. A platform had been erected for the band and now band members stood atop it tuning instruments. Visitors of all ages showed up, crowding the yard with more cars and bodies than Nicholas had seen in a long time.

  When the party finally kicked off, Nicholas was already tired. Searching for a place to sit and rest, he had to pass by Ellie and her girlfriends. When they saw him they batted their eyelashes, pouted their lips, and held out their hands in greeting. He said pleasant things to each lady, making sure to remember their names.

  When the band kicked off the night, Nicholas invited each of Ellie's girlfriends, in turn, onto the dance floor. Slow or fast, Nicholas and the ladies kept time to the music. He could feel the heat of Ellie's gaze as he waltzed around the floor with one of the more attractive women.

  His plan from the outset had been to garner her forgiveness by all his hard work, but she'd avoided him all morning and afternoon, not even glancing his way or even once saying thank you. Then, when he'd noticed her lady friends, he'd decided to make her jealous. No matter what she said, the kiss at the waterfall had meant something to her. The world had practically spun off its axis when their lips met. There was no denying their attraction to one another.

  "Hey, you're a pretty good dancer."

  "Thanks," said Nicholas to his current partner.

  Blisters were forming on his heels and his toes hurt from all the women stepping on them. His partner jerked and flailed in front of him. Several times she smacked him in the head when he didn't move out of her way in time. When the song ended, he was happy to lead her to a seat and excuse himself. He headed to the food table.

  "Looks like you're having a good time," his dad said. When Nicholas shrugged, he added, "You're trying to get her attention, aren't you?"

  "Is it that obvious?"

  "Well, let's see, I think you've danced with every girl here. And you helped set up the entire stage as well as doing every ridiculous thing Carla came up with. Yeah, I think it's pretty obvious."

  "Well, Ellie hasn't noticed it. Dad, what am I doing wrong? I've done everything to get her attention. I just want her to forgive me so we can move past this."

  "Have you tried apologizing directly?"

  "Well, I, hmm…I thought I did, but maybe I didn't."

  "Then try it for heaven's sake! I don't think I can stand watching some of those girls on the dance floor again."

  Nicholas smiled at his father and then sidled over to where Ellie sat sipping a glass of iced tea. Holding his hand out, he asked, "May I have this dance?"

  The band struck up an old, slow song called Angel Eyes, and Ellie accepted his hand. Trance like, he walked her to the floor. Nicholas wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. Under the lantern lights her skin and hair glowed, lending a magical quality to the atmosphere.

  "I need to say–"

  Ellie placed her finger across his lips and shook her head. Moving closer, she laid her head on his chest. In a dancers' embrace they moved slowly with the music.

  ****

  Later, at home, Shane looked at Nicholas and shook his head, a smile quirking the corners of his mouth. Nicholas smiled back. It appeared life was once again on track. Ellie had danced willingly with him,
not shunning him. They had danced exclusively the rest of the night. But as he lay in bed, he suddenly realized he hadn't apologized. She hadn't wanted him to speak. In fact they hadn't spoken at all. He needed to fix that, and soon.

  Dressing early the next morning in a white T-shirt and jeans, Nicholas hurried outside. Following the path to the big house barely lit by the rising sun, he made his way to the chicken coop and hung an electric lamp on a hook. Before long he had gathered enough eggs to fill a basket. The physical work freed his mind and allowed him to focus on his next course of action.

  The smell of fresh flowers blew across the yard and Nicholas followed the fragrance, pulling a knife from his pocket. Cutting a few roses, he returned to the cabin to look for some makeshift wrapping paper and string. When he was satisfied with the peace offering, he carried it back to the house and laid it on the railing with a note.

  Surely everyone was up by now. Slipping through the back door, he checked for Charlotte. In the kitchen the elderly woman whistled and rolled out dough, moving back and forth to music streaming from the radio.

  "Charlotte?"

  Her hand fluttered to her heart as she twirled around to face him. "My dear boy, you about scared me half to death."

  "Sorry. I was looking for Jake."

  "Oh, he's been in the hay field all morning. Shane and Ellie are there with him."

  Nicholas thanked her and ran to the barn. They were already out working! He'd assumed that with the late night he was the first person up. Quickly saddling a horse, he was just about to step into the stirrup when he heard footsteps behind him.

  "Hello, Nicholas," Carla said in a sultry voice.

  He turned around, startled to hear her.

  She said, "I think you know it was only a matter of time."

  "Excuse me?"

  She stepped forward, her ruby red lips forming a pouty expression. When only inches separated them, she traced her finger down his chest. Nicholas recoiled.